Chris Simms Dry Snitches On The Texas Longhorns, Says He 'May Have Gotten A Few $100 Handshakes'

To indirectly tell secrets or offenses to a person of authority or any person meant to be kept away from a secret or offense, sometimes inadvertently. If the telling of secrets or offenses is purposeful, minute details are usually left out as not to appear to be directly telling. — Urban Dictionary's definition of 'Dry Snitching'

What happens in the back alleys of college football should stay in those alleys. It is like Las Vegas, but with even more corruption, greed and money funneling. Players get handouts — at least some of them do at certain colleges. Most fan bases pretend it only happens at rival institutions. Fans outside the SEC love spelling it $EC. However, very few players ever talk about what happens behind closed doors.

Chris Simms broke that rule. The former University of Texas quarterback was filling in as a guest host on CBS Sports’ Tiki and Tierney on Wednesday when he decided it was a good time to snitch and said this:

“They didn’t pay me. There might have been some cash going around to other players; I’m not going to deny that. I got some $100 handshakes every now and then for signing some autographs — you know, for big alumni, he might have a jersey, a bunch of jerseys he wants me to sign real quick. Sure, he’d give me a $100 handshake. That was the best.”

It isn’t the fact that Simms acknowledged these handshakes occur that makes this story interesting. Most people with a working brain realize this type of stuff happens all the time at basically every school. What makes this story fascinating is that Simms essentially lumped in former teammates to the story. He implied that at least some of his teammates were paid, all without a warrant.

Ever eat something you weren’t supposed to eat at home and your sibling ratted you out without your mom even noticing? That is what happened here, and it came from a guy who arrived to college check-in in a limo (true story) and never wanted for anything in his life.

Simms probably had no malice when making these admissions. I doubt he planned on anyone getting in trouble or for the Longhorn program to come under suspicion. He was just another gas bag on radio spouting out. But, intention isn’t what runs social media, and it definitely doesn’t have any impact on what the NCAA does and doesn’t look into.

It would be surprising if the NCAA did anything with this information. The corruption starts at the top, and the NCAA knows what is happening at college campuses, turning a blind-eye to prevent the whole sport from losing the illusion of amateurism. Simms likely didn’t get Texas or Mack Brown or former athletic director DeLoss Dodds in trouble. He probably didn’t even get former teammates in trouble.

But I’m guessing his phone is lighting up with text messages and calls from his former teammates wondering why it was necessary to even say. And I wouldn’t blame a single one of them.

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