2012 NHL Playoffs: Why Each Playoff Team Won’t Hoist The Cup

Yesterday, my esteemed colleague M. Trible laid out why each NHL playoff team can hoist Lord Stanley’s Cup. Today, I’m here to tell you why each team won’t.


New York Rangers (1)

Admittedly, the Rangers have the look of a Stanley Cup team. They play an up-and-down style, forecheck relentlessly, play tremendous defense and have the best goaltender in the world. Marian Gaborik provides an elite scoring touch, Ryan Callahan does it all and coach John Tortorella demands the best out of his team. But come on, this is the New York Rangers we’re talking about, the same franchise that hasn’t won consecutive playoff series since 1997. Once springtime rolls around, the Rangers feel the heat and usually fold. A slight stumble down the stretch to give Pittsburgh and Philadelphia a chance to catch them didn’t exactly inspire a ton of confidence either.

Boston Bruins (2)

The defending champs are back with a high seed and their entire core in tact. Here’s the thing; no team has won back-to-back Cups since the Red Wings more than a decade ago, in 1997 and 1998. It’s damn hard to win it once, let alone twice. Boston has a bull’s eye on its back, and it takes on the talented, dangerous Capitals in first round. Don’t count on a repeat.

Florida Panthers (3)

I’m going to go ahead and let Ryan Lambert of Puck Daddy explain:

“What you may not know about the Florida Panthers, though, is that not only are they not a good team, they are quite literally the worst team since the lockout — i.e. when we got the shootout and all that bad stuff — to qualify for the Stanley Cup playoffs. How much worse are they? They finished the season with just 38 wins, for one thing. They lost more games than they won despite playing in probably the worst division in the league. No team has even made the playoffs winning that few games since the institution of the shootout, though Montreal and Boston had 39 each in 2010.

And prior to this year, no team has locked up a top-three seed as a division winner with fewer than 43. Florida and Phoenix (42) both got in under that particularly low limbo bar this season.”

Translation, the Panthers stink.

Pittsburgh Penguins (4)

Sidney Crosby has skated in a grand total of 22 games this season, and given his history over the past year, he’s just one dangerous shot away from being eliminated. That may be a bit cryptic, but don’t think there’s any love lost between the Flyers and Sid the Kid. He’ll be targeted every time he takes the ice. And a first-round battle with intrastate rival Philadelphia could prove to take too much out of the Pens if they were to survive. If not, their porous defensive coverage of late just might.

Philadelphia Flyers (5)

Too many penalties, too many rookies, too many injuries. Yes, the Flyers’ rookies have been better than any other teams’ rookies this season, and they’ve managed injuries well, but sooner or later, that youth and the absence or threat of absence from key guys like Chris Pronger, Andrej Meszaros, James van Riemsdyk (last postseason’s hero) and Danny Briere could finally catch up. Also, goaltender Ilya Bryzgalov has seen limited action down the stretch after playing lights out in March due to a chip fracture in his foot. Will he be the man from March, or the head case that sat on the sidelines during the Winter Classic?

New Jersey Devils (6)

Trible is right in that the Devils are the most underrated team in the playoffs. They’ve been overshadowed by division rivals New York, Pittsburgh and Philadelphia all season long. That’s because they simply aren’t quite as good as any of those teams. Plus, Martin Brodeur is like 8,000 years old.

Washington Capitals (7)

The Caps underachieved all season long. Hell, they ceded the division to the Panthers, quite literally the worst division winner since the shootout rules were implemented. When you take into consideration the history of underachieving in the postseason the past few years, you have yourself a team of underachievers. What I’m trying to say is the Caps will continue to underachieve, because they are who we thought they were: underachievers.

Ottawa Senators (8)

The Senators have the worst goals against average (2.83) of any team in the playoffs. They play next to no defense. You can’t win in the Stanley Cup if you don’t play defense. Luckily, Ottawa fans are used to not winning the Cup.

7 Replies to “2012 NHL Playoffs: Why Each Playoff Team Won’t Hoist The Cup”

    1. I have faith in the Bryz from March, just not the Bryz from earlier in the year or the guy who was a sieve the past two times in the playoffs for an admittedly not very good Phoenix team. I hope the guy from March is the one who shows up.

  1. Seriously though, as Rev points out, we might as well rename these the Mirror Playoffs because there seem to be Eastern & Western twins on both sides of the bracket. Top-seeded talents who can’t get over the hump (yet), super-talented underachieving seventh-seeded teams, recent champs with injured star forwards (or returning), overachieving teams that took advantage of bad divisions, and young goaltenders needing to carry offensively-challeneged lines.

    Yeah, the Mirror Playoffs.

  2. Being that I no longer have a horse in this race since my Hurricanes decided to turn against winning, I will roll with the New York Rangers for a while, since they were my first Hockey love. The Canes won me over quickly though as they were closer and fun to watch.

    I like the Flyers to win it all though. They have some young guns who if they can cut down on the penalties can make a run for the cup this year.

    Like both Rev and Trible said though it is too hard to pick.

    1. Man, do I ever hope you’re right. Honestly, I have no idea who will be the last team standing, but if I had to make a pick, I’m gonna go a little crazy and say Rangers beat the Sharks in the Final. Want to say the Blues will get there, but I got a weird feeling about San Jose.

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